I'm tired of using my body as the excuse to why I look and feel bad about myself. Fine my disability and the issues that arise with it, are out of my control but how I react to it is my choice. Instead of letting my body become my hell hole and trying to reduce any amount of femininity that I had to feel as least like a woman as possible because I had already let my disability overwhelm my body and entire being. Instead of feeling like a woman in all other aspects of my life and body that I can control and feeling as beautiful and sexy and portray to others a confident beautiful woman I let what I have been feeling for years overwhelm any other aspect of self-care and self-love, not completely but partially to the point of self-neglect. The way to change this for myself is to start with small things but also to internalize that I am beautiful and can show it more by losing a lot of weight and dressing and paying more attention to my body care and looks and that looking feminine and beautiful is a good thing that will make me happier with myself when I start caring for myself with self-love instead of self-loathing.Here is to small changes inside and out to a more beautiful self and world.
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